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hosts two annual fundraisers-a dinner in New York City during the summer and a Celebrity Golf Classic in Tampa, Fla. Received the Joan Payson Award for community service in 1997, presented annually by the New York chapter of the BBWAA…

Hilarious dating adds

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Everyone wants to find love, affection and acceptance.Most people are searching for a soulmate, or at least for someone to hang out with on the weekends.That is why personal advertisements have been popular since man first learned how to carve in stone. Today's personals are all about finesse, glamor, and charm..not.I haven't actually seen a prehistoric singles ad, but I am pretty sure that it would read something like this: Come to think of it, that may have been in Jean M. Since hubs are supposed to be educational, I am presenting these examples of real singles ads as examples of how NOT to behave in regards to your future love life.Some men are just born with the ability to charm a woman.They know the right words, the right moves, and the right attitude to take. Check out a few of these James Bond competitors: A lot of women are seeking sensitive men.Talking to people in the real world until you trick someone into thinking you’re attractive and funny is not only difficult, but incredibly time-consuming.

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Disembodied head in jar, 24, seeks pixie goddess to fiddle with while Rome burns. Must wear size five shoes.""Small lumpy squid monkey seeks healthy woman with no identifying scars, any age. Recommend appreciation of high-pitched, screeching noises. Gentle, middle-aged teddy bear with unfortunate flatulence challenge seeking olfaction-impaired ourdoors girl for good times and possible matrimony. Onto the bike, Beeyotch, grab hold (you know where!

Enjoy these thirty-three funny Tinder profiles that definitely got their creators some action: Thanks to r/Tinder, imgur, and us for the images above.

And if you enjoyed this collection of hilarious Tinder profiles, be sure to check out our other posts on Tinder lines from the professionals and Tinder pick-up lines that guarantee you spend the night alone!

Soup is good food.""I like eating mayonnaise and peanut butter sandwiches in the rain, watching Barney Miller reruns, peeing on birds in the park and licking strangers on the subway; you eat beets raw, have climbed Kilimanjaro, and sweat freely and often. Rabid Wonder Woman fan looking for someone in satin tights, fighting for our rights and the old red, white 'n blue. Some willingness to assist with basic bodily functions required. *sigh*MWM, 73, looking for SWF 18-35 for an intimate encounter with my wife and myself in a threesome. The things she does with her teeth are out of this world, too, especially when their in her mouth.

) in search of bottlenosed dolphin and extra prickly cactus juice. No tongue."*******************************************************************If you want more, just let me know!!! here goes:"Neurotic midget with collection of warning labels seeks someone whose grave he can dance on after the Apocalypse. Look me in the eye and snap a z.""There is a little place in the jumbled sock drawer of my heart where you match up all the pairs, throw out the ones with holes in them, and buy me some of those neat dressy ones with the weird black and red geometrical designs on them.""Mmmm, Pez! SJM 27 wants to look someone in the eye so don't be tall. No freaks."****I think the last one is my favorite! seeking svelte, kinky sex vixen for impossible fantasy roleplay. Sure, her tits drag on the carpet till her nipples bleed and she had to lift them and her belly out of the way just to sit down, but she's beautiful.